The Real Frank Zappa Book Review

I always wondered if I never read this book, who knows what I would have done musically? While like most bios, it delves into Frank’s Zappa’s childhood and teenage years. It was his thoughts on music that made me read this countless times. The book maybe a tad biased, as it’s from Frank’s point of view, but you can see why Frank was so outspoken; from being arrested by an undercover cop called Detective Willis over a misdemeanour “conspiracy to commit pornography” to being shafted royally by managers and record companies. In addition, Willis took Frank’s music without permission that he recorded in Studio Z. I for one would love to find out what happened to those tapes. Frank’s utter contempt for authority figures comes through crystal clear; and some of it rubbed off on me. We are also treated to his thoughts on 50s love songs which he had nothing but disdain for them saying that they were “One of the causes of bad mental health in the United States.” Frank's reasoning was that people who buy into those lyrics go through life feeling cheated.

They are a lot of interesting colourful characters in these pages; Louie the Turkey, Captain Beefheart, The Plaster Casters etc I won’t spoil who else is mentioned. The chapters about composition is where the book shines, it’s the musicians equivalent of “A Brief History of Time.” How he approaches music in general is not only fascinating, but a revelation. Frank Zappa was purveyor of future music; its ideas, concepts are all too big to comprehend in the present. Even now since his passing in 1993, its still future music. If you want open your mind to bigger musical horizons, give it a read. You will learn about life, the road, and music.

Stuart Ritchie

Spring Break Tropicaledonia Review

I have stumbled upon the musical equivalent of Krush Groove. This is rap without aggression or ego; this is old school hip-hop revived. Spring Break with their debut “Tropicaledonia” have stripped it all back to what made hip-hop one of the voices of youth culture in the 80s. Songs like “Won’t Go Away” is a Latin dance mixed with Scottish dance; it’s like if Santana’s “Supernatural” was Scottish. “Rodeo Railroad” is blues mixed with Native American melodies. Live this track should exude power, with the earthy hypnotic beat combined with the rusted harmonica. There is a lot of fun on the record; on “Captain Chaos,” I can imagine Deadpool rapping to this freestyle. “The Velvet” is elevator music for the non-beige in society. The happily violent track “Dolphin Puncher” is a highlight; “So mad you could punch a dolphin” should be on a T-shirt. “Did it Matter” with its positive vibe but undercurrent indignation about the end of friendship. It could be a single from the album. “Alone to the Metronome” with its late 80s club beats but with existentialist lyrics. “Tropicaledonia” is the type of album you can listen to on a loop and be hypnotised by its simplicity. It’s a good starting point for a group with lots of potential. Spring Break don’t use samples, they don’t need no stinkin’ samples.

                                                              

Stuart Ritchie

Good Vibrations Film Review

This wonderful little music film is bloody good. The film follows Terri Hooley; an idealist, peace loving man at odds with the “troubles” in Belfast in the 70s. He sees a parallel between his city and Jamaica and decides to open a record shop, to bring reggae to Belfast, in the most bombed street. Later at a gig, he sees the beginning of a new music scene, Punk. With his idealistic spirit, he starts a small record company to record the local Belfast punk bands; including Rudi, The Outcasts, and The Undertones with their classic single “Teenage Kicks” the number one song of legendary radio one DJ John Peel. Terri is a character you want to see succeed; my favourite scene is when a record company executive is telling him the record is “shite” Terri incensed begins to take gold records off the wall smashing them claiming they are “shite”. This made me laugh so hard and personally would love to do that to all those glorified tea boys in business suits. All the idealism comes at a cost though. Terri sells the record “Teenage Kicks” to a record company for £500 and a signed photo of The Shangri-Las; Terri never got the photo. Terri had no head for the business side and he loses the shop in the end, there is a pattern of reopening and shutting until the final time in 2015. The “Troubles” created Belfast Punk, the youth needed something to make them feel alive for a while instead of the constant fear of being lynched, beaten, and bombed. It was their escape and the ticket out of the status quo. In the finale, Terri’s speech about the importance of punk was right “New York has the haircuts, London has the trousers, but Belfast has the reason!”

Stuart Ritchie  

 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Good_Vibrations_(film)

We Don't Need No education: How Cuts in Scottish Music Tuition Can Be Catastrophic!

When I was at high school there was music tuition; I didn’t get the tuition or qualify for it, but my point being it was still there for those who wanted it. This might be history soon as myopic, incompetent councillors have opted to get rid of it altogether, to save “their” precious little pennies. This smells of musical elitism; bordering on Virginia Woolf’s level. Because of the cuts, they are 350 fewer music instructors now than in 2007. This is disgusting to me personally as a musician and composer. I might play the electric guitar, what I know is looked down upon among elitists and I shouldn’t in their eyes be voicing my opinion. However, i feel if you play an instrument, you have a voice. It might be looked down upon, but the guitar is a fascinating instrument. They are countless disciplines and styles; infinite numbers of ways you play the instrument, it can be used in Indian music, jazz, fusion and classical. The guitar is only one instrument though. Let us look at a school orchestra, which will be in jeopardy with these cuts. Let’s ask one question, what makes all the instruments different? The sound of the instrument is what makes a child wants to pick it up in the first place. It could be a bassoon, flute, or trombone. Sound is what calls to them and what makes them want to learn how to play. It empowers them with a skill and discipline they can use in later life, they can become teachers and pass on their knowledge, or maybe they can travel the world playing the works of composers like Stravinsky and Wagner; the choice is up to them. In addition, traditional music teachers are under threat with these cuts. There will always be children who are interested in traditional music, they might find playing songs like “The Crab fish” “Wild Mountain Thyme” be more for fun for them. There is no good valid reason at all for these cuts. This will be depriving many kids of their basic right to music education. It will be all swept away until only rich and “well to do” parents can afford the luxurious service of music tuition so when their child grows up they have some musical entertainment when they all meet up once a year. The thought of that possible future makes me want to throw up. All music is for everyone, not those who view it as a leisure activity. Music is for all who want to learn it and love making music. Music is for everyone, not the elite.

Stuart Ritchie

Steve Vai 02 ABC June 1st 2016 Gig Review

The virtuoso guitarist Steve Vai kicked off his 25^th Anniversary tour of his album ‘Passion and Warfare’ in Glasgow last night. The show opened with footage from the 1986 cult film ‘Crossroads’- a film that Vai appeared as the devil’s own guitarist- Steve took to the stage dressed as a futuristic rock-star; with lights coming from his silvery hoodie, and futuristic looking 80s style shades and a lit up Ibanez Universe seven string guitar.

  ‘Bad Horsie’ was bombarding the audience with a heavy slide riff, which the fans were digging immensely. After the opener, he discarded the light-up guitar and the hoodie. With the heat in the venue, I could hardly blame mister Vai.

The guitar gymnastic stylings of ‘The attitude song’, followed suit; a plenitude of devastatingly complex guitar licks erupted.

 ‘Gravity Storm’ a thunderous heavy track; with a Hendrix style feel. So heavy, you felt the vibrations hit your body.

 ‘Whispering a Prayer’ , is like an ancient melody passed down giving it a beautiful primal but gentle sound; playing centuries of musical tradition in a short space of time.

Steve began to play the entirety of ‘Passion and Warfare’ starting with the grandiose ‘Liberty’. He was aided by Brian May on screen.

 ‘Erotic Nightmares’ filled with floating sensuous guitar lines, and a musical dream sequence which Steve screamed into the guitar for an effect.

 ‘The Animal’ a heavy swing-styled track with Steve doing call and response to the audience and joking, he could do that all night.

 ‘Answers’ was a burst of undiluted joy; A bright fast-paced adrenalized composition. Featuring a guest appearance by Steve’s old guitar teacher Joe Satriani on screen, this was a welcome surprise to the audience.

 ‘The Riddle’; a track not played live before; had a great reception. There was a motif of the song ‘Answers’ included.

‘Ballerina 12/24’,’ is a short fun piece; a quirky Harpo Marx, Looney Tunes styled melody.

 ‘For the Love of God’, in this song, Steve is always trying for a deeper, more intimate connection with the guitar, trying to reach a new plateau. You can tell this by his many, many facial expressions.

‘The audience is Listening’ is a playful song, opened with the 90s music video that shows a young Steve Vai causing a riot with his music in class. This particular song was a fantasy of mine playing this track in my music class to upset my utterly odious music teacher. John Petrucci from Dream Theater joins Steve on screen for a fun, energetic guitar duel.

‘I Would Love To’, is a sunshine song, with a very cheesy 90s music video.

  ‘Blue Powder’ a wonderful mystic tinged ballad; the melody seems very fragile and has intricate nuances. It also featured an excellent slap bass solo from the fabulous Phillip Byno.

 ‘Greasy Kids Stuff’, a dirty rough fast-paced song caked with filthy guitar leads, played live for the first time.

  ‘Alien Water Kiss’ a unique track as it’s created by Steve’s experimentations with the Eventide Harmoniser H3000.

 ‘Sisters’ was a very beautiful song, which has a quality of tenderness and love. It seems very earthy but lofty in sound and feel.

‘Love secrets’ is a strange unconventional track which must have been a really rigorous track to play correctly. Steve seemed overwhelmed at the audience’s vigorous response and applause.

Steve then surprised us all by doing a cover of Frank Zappa’s song ‘Stevie’s spanking’; a song that Frank wrote about Steve’s encounter with a groupie than Frank actually knew.

 As a Zappa fan, it was a wonderful nostalgic trip hearing this song live.

Vai then invited three lucky members of the audience on stage to ‘Build Me a Song’. It’s a wonderful idea to be able to create a different song every night on the spur of a moment. Steve regaled us with a story of a female fan’s fantasy to sit on his amplifier while he played ‘Bad Horsie.’ The people on stage helped the band compose a drum part, a bass line instantly played by Phillip Byno; this due to his amazing perfect pitch. There was also a rhythm guitar part and a lead guitar part. Overall, it was a wonderful entertaining experience.

The encore, ‘Taurus Bulba’ a very heavy track, had a humorous moment when Steve put his guitar around ‘Donna’ a female audience member he invited on stage; additionally he said she smelled like a cupcake and Donna looked like she was in pure ecstasy. At the end of the song, he said to the audience “just one more note.” Finally, he threw out the only guitar pick he used all evening and I caught it; this made the whole experience cosmic.

Stuart Ritchie